Why is achieving balance so difficult?

Balance /Bal(ə)ns/: an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain upright and steady. Upright. Steady. Neither accurately describe my movements last weekend: spending my entire Saturday in bed, painfully hungover to the point I considered ringing 101 just to declare to a medical professional I might be on my way out, in contrast to my 6am start Sunday morning, sweating out my sins in the gym. I'm fully aware this is not balance, but I just can't seem to get it right.

Why is finding a happy medium when it comes to juggling work, relationships, our health and social life so damn difficult? Why, if we wholly commit ourselves to one social concept, must the others pay the price? For a long time now, I've grown increasingly frustrated with my all or nothing approach to life. Perhaps it feeds back into identifying as a perfectionist, but I can't seem to achieve contentment across the board. Much to my dismay, I find it difficult to do things in moderation and seem to either thrive or survive with very little in between.

Take 'detoxing' for example: the word itself is pretty ironic, as I personally believe it's one of the most toxic concepts out there. Monday morning swings around again and after the third heavier-than-anticipated weekend in a row comes to a close, I begrudgingly jump back on the fragile bandwagon that is the 'health kick'. For two weeks, I am quite literally Gillian McKeith herself (minus the emphasis on toilet talk) and refuse to let anything other than leafy greens and lemon-infused water pass my lips. Spoiler: that gets boring quick and I soon find the temptation of a few too many gins in the sunshine followed by an oh so delicious but calorically-outrageous Deliveroo order at 3am impossible to deny. The following head-thumping, liver-throbbing day is numbed somewhat by an unnecessary brunch and probably a packet of Oreos demolished in bed. From one extreme to the other, the vicious cycle is one I know plagues more lives than just my own. So what's causing this counterproductive, resource-draining pattern and how do we eradicate it once and for all?

Thanks to social media, it's easier than ever to make it look like you have your life together when in reality, you hate your job, you haven't found time to shower in 4 days and you find yourself buying new underwear rather than rectifying your washing basket situation (just me?). We can't deny that the endless scrolling through Instagram brings out our inner green-eyed monster and despite often feeling totally overwhelmed, find ourselves snapping our every move to prove to the world we have an abundance of friends who we have abundant fun with. There's always a new standard to achieve: abs, buying your first house, a promotion at work, right down to aesthetically-pleasing bottomless brunches with your gal pals. The pressure to always be on the ball is all-consuming, so it's no wonder we worry ourselves silly that we're not living our best lives. Comparison is the thief of joy, so get over yourself and spend more time doing things you actually enjoy rather than what you believe will be the envy of your Facebook 'friends'.

It's both a blessing and a curse that we've created an existence where everything is at our fingertips. Sure, money doesn't grow on trees and even if it did, I'm sure the taxman would devise a way to nab it first, but opportunity lurks around every corner. Because of this, we get bored easily and believe stability represents stagnation, rather than a state of comfort. Why upgrade your iPhone to the 8, when you know the X exists? Oh, because they're virtually the same except that the X will cost you £40, your first born child and a 12th of your soul a month more until your contract ends? Sounds like a deal to me. We're no longer willing to settle for adequate and it's because we're always chasing the next temporary high. When did being rational go out of fashion? Why must we do everything in the extremes? There should be no shame in choosing the safe option if it generates long-term happiness over a short-term buzz.

My latest theory is that we're all totally, completely and relentlessly terrified of being sad. Heaven forbid you wake up on the wrong side of the bed and feel a little less chipper than normal for no apparent reason - there must be an underlying factor. Maybe it's because I don't work hard enough? I'll take another shift. Maybe it's because I haven't bought myself anything nice recently? I'll go on a spree. Maybe it's because I ate those biscuits yesterday? No sugar for a month. Or maybe it's because you're a person and while ideally we'd all be as 'unbreakable' as 'Kimmy Schmidt', sadness is inevitable. We no longer give ourselves the opportunity to confront our emotions and solve them logically but rather overhaul an entire aspect of our lives because we must be doing something wrong. Give yourself a break.

Balance is difficult and I've certainly not mastered it, but I really believe the second we stop trying to resolve our issues with extreme, unsustainable solutions, the sooner we'll start leading more unshakable lives. Stop wanting for what you don't have and start recognizing what you do, or you'll never be truly satisfied.